How to Release Your Pent-up Emotions

There is a certain feeling you get right in the middle of your heart when you’re about to be ambushed by emotions you’d rather not deal with, specifically those you have been resolutely pushing down into the deep recesses of your mind as often as you can.

Here’s the funny thing about emotions, they  simply do not care how much you try to avoid them!

Trust me, whatever you are resisting emotions wise, will persist until you acknowledge, validate and finally release them.

Worry and frustration would slither into my head in the form of tension- a tightening around my forehead- leading to the kind of pressure that always threatened a headache, before releasing the floodgates to my insecurities and fears.

An answering call of frantic energy would then assail me and I have been known to call my friends in a miserable panic, saying I felt as if I was ‘ missing something’, or ‘needing just one win’ and of course ‘ not being able to focus’, because of this repressed energy.

It’s a kind of energy that is hard to explain, but once you’ve felt it, you know exactly what it is, the slippery slide to stress-thinking to becoming overwhelmed and you just feel ‘off’.

If you have ever felt like the above, then I have great news for you!

It’s time for you to release that pent-up emotion in your body that you’ve been trying to bury within yourself or just been straight up trying to avoid.

It’s time to release them by feeling them without any judgment, without attaching any meaning to them and by simply acknowledging that they are there and not fighting against them.

You release them by facing them, feeling them, realizing what they are trying to communicate to you and then release it all.

Releasing these emotions from your mental vault, will allow you to gain improved energy and more clarity, as well as the ability to ground yourself so that you can actually achieve the goals you want to.

The real challenges come when you are unwilling to face the emotions, because you are afraid or ashamed of what they could mean if you dared acknowledge them.

Another challenge arises when you aren’t even aware of what it is you actually need, and because of that, react by pushing more into the feelings and resulting limiting beliefs, creating more frantic energy and spiraling into the emotional abyss.

And that is the exact opposite of what you want to feel or think.

When it comes to emotions, you need to remember that they are mercurial and very fluid. You have the ability to flow through several emotions within a span of second, and each emotion comes with its’ own thought and reactive action.

The thing is, you decide how you react to your emotions and whether you attach significance to them, a meaning to them or even an action to them in those moments of feeling them.

Emotions are neither good or bad nor right or wrong.

They are in fact simply indicators of how a situation or event is triggering you at that moment. Emotions are indicators of how you are actually reacting to the presented stimuli. Every emotion you feel is valid and worthy of being acknowledged by you the person who is currently feeling them.

Acknowledging your emotions does not mean reacting, it means that you get to take a moment and realize what you are actually feeling towards that event or stimuli.

It’s the body’s way of alerting to you to the tone of the event/ situation/ person you are interacting with.

The purpose of acknowledging you emotions is not to fix them or make them go away- that’s you avoiding still- rather it’s to release their energy so you move from being blocked and overwhelmed to clear and mission focused again.

Ultimately, you decide which emotion fueled action if any, you will take.

So when you feel overwhelmed or like a storm is brewing in your head and body that simply means it’s time to look inwards and feel the feelings.

What I usually do and what I hope will also work for you is a light form of meditation. Please note, my idea of meditation is sitting quietly on my bed, sometimes with calming music, or with just the sound of the sea and simply being.

It always starts with me feeling anxious just being so still and doing nothing, but the more I feel like that or realize that I’m seeking distractions, it’s how I know that I need to reconnect with myself.

So I sit there, allowing my mind to zone away and drift, after I’ve made it clear that I am determined to be on this drive. I won’t lie.

It is not easy to just let your mind wander, because when you’re so accustomed to distracting yourself with work or TV or other activities, it does feel boring and weird to just day dream, yet it is one of the best ways to dive under the surface and see what is really brewing within yourself.

So let yourself get bored, frustrated. It’s ok to feel frustrated that your mind is wandering; you’re on the right track if that happens. It’ll feel like you’ve zoned out and your breathing will naturally align with your mental state, so just let go.

Sometimes focusing on one object that makes me feel calm helps me to let go easier and, I just mean looking at it and allowing my mind to wander off, without trying to pick, choose or avoid any of the thoughts that come up in that state.

When you’re ready, ask yourself, ‘What is underneath this feeling?” “What am I avoiding feeling in this moment?”

When you get the answer, allow yourself to look at it, converse and understand where it stems from, what it is trying to tell you.

You may feel anxiety tightening around your head, fear creeping into your veins or stress at something you feel unfinished, whatever it is, acknowledge it, and see what it is signaling to you.

Then release it.

This happens when you acknowledge the emotion, and the thing it is trying to signal in you. Once emotions have been acknowledged, they basically release themselves.

We run into trouble when we try to fight, bury or cling to one emotion, feeding into it and making it into something more than it was meant to be by adding our insecurities and attaching meaning to it.

20 thoughts on “How to Release Your Pent-up Emotions

  1. Took me a long time to come to terms with these truths you speak of. Since I was a child, I’ve always been rather emotional, and even as an adult I sometimes struggle with my emotions. I’ve learned over the years to allow myself to acknowledge the emotion and to allow it to lead me to the root thought that has me so wound up, and then from there I can dissect that thought and release the emotional response. When I take the time to do that, I can almost guarantee I will be able to move on from it. Thanks for this post, I think it’s important for everyone to pay close attention to both their emotions and more importantly, their responses to those emotions.

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  2. I learned how to confront my emotions and let them out when I lost my best friend. I was able to let it all out when I needed and understand when it was time to confront memories or emotions. I think more people should do that, as you said, instead of trying to keep it all in.

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  3. I’ve been working really hard over the last several years on trying to keep my emotions in check and not flying off the handle. It is a daily practice and I know I’m not alone. Take a moment to sit and meditate and try to let the feeling pass. It’s important to figure out why you are feeling the way you do so that next time when something similar happens you don’t have the same reaction.

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  4. This is a wonderful and very well written article on emotions. My son struggles with anxiety and is very emotional and I can see in him the qualities you spoke of with getting overwhelmed by certain worries and feelings. It’s like emotions are layered over even more emotions, deeper ones. I know when I feel like that it can be daunting, let alone a ten year old trying to cope with it. I really like these ideas you bring up here and am going to try to help my son by employing them on his level. Thanks for sharing your knowledge!

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  5. This is so good. My favorite line: “Emotions are neither good or bad nor right or wrong. They are in fact simply indicators of how a situation or event is triggering you at that moment.” I love when people break stuff down like that.

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  6. Wonderful article, like many I also struggle with keeping my emotions in check from time to time especially my anger so finding ways to help control it are always quite useful.

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  7. I used to be easily overwhelmed with emotions but I found ways how to deal with them. It’s not an easy process and I think a lot of it is because I am a teacher who needs to be in control of situations.

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  8. Even people with strong senses of self who seem to be in control lose it once in a while so it’s always helpful to remember that how you feel is always valid, like you mentioned. How people react is up to the individual. They always say to never make a permanent decision based on a temporary emotion

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  9. I really like how you point out that “Emotions are neither good or bad nor right or wrong.” I agree that they are a powerful tool to be used to show us what’s going on in our lives. I really enjoyed your post! Thanks for sharing!!

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  10. I just learned how to properly feel feelings lol. It only took a few months in therapy! But yes you have to acknowledging your feelings and feeling them is the only way to get past them.

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