I am actually really excited to bring to you this audio post today, because the subject is so real to me and it is something that I think we need to be open and honest about.
In this post I riff on one of the biggest sexual hurdles women and men have to overcome not only to move on to a new relationship but also to heal and come to terms with your own sexual desires.
Within this post :
>> I talk about growing and evolving as a person and as a being with sexual wants and desires, a little bit about my own experience and how I got over feeling as if I was a prude.
>> The tips in this post allowed me to be super honest about what I want ( to my partner and myself) when it came to sex and it was such a powerful shift.
>> We talk why BDSM and Vanilla sex both require trust, respect of your boundaries and an open door to explore your desires safely.
You are allowed to feel differently with another person and even want to try something that may have been of the table before, simply because with this new person, you feel safe, you want to experiment and you are ready to.
There is no rush when it comes to sex, in fact it is one of the many activities we will do as adult humans that is natural and goes to your individual pacing, tastes and enjoyment levels. The act is one that connects you to your partner, because of how intimate it is, how you share energies and how you also share health truths.
Click to listen to this audio now and if it feels right, like the post and leave a comment.
It’s no secret that life can be hectic, stressful and frustrating, however, just as there are foods to boost your mood and increase your confidence, there are some self-care practices that goes a very long to increase your good mood and give you the shot of confidence you will need as you go through your day.
Looking good, makes you feel good and all you’ll need throughout the day is a mirror.
Anyone who has met me for more than 5 minutes know that I love wine and I love wrestling, so of course, I’m beyond curious about the Belle Radici wine, founded by WWE’s former wrestlers, turn mega entrepreneurs, The Bella Twins, Nikki and Brie Bella ( real names, Stephanie Nicole Garcia and Brianna Danielson).
I also am an avid reality tv show watcher, should something pique my curiosity and Total Divas and Total Bellas are very entertaining and offered me a much coveted chance to slay my ever growing curiosity about wrestler’s life and travelling…but now back to the wine.
I remember when the Bella’s made the inspired choice to try their hand at wine making, since like me, they loved the fermented grape goodness and thanks to television and the invasion of cameras, I felt as if I got to see the product come to fruition ( pun totally intended).
Belle Radici according to their website is Italian for ‘beautiful roots’ and is a nice way of describing the diverse team behind the making of this wine.
The reviews on their facebook page have been pretty phenomenal, which does nothing to curb by envy and want!
Exhibit A : “Maggie Douglas recommends Belle Radici. I was “graciously” blessed with just a taste of this heavenly nectar, and was VERY impressed! The bouquet, the fullness of flavor with a sweet hint of fruitiness….. truly one of the finest, most delicious wines I’ve ever had!”
Law of Attraction, Law of Vacuums and the Backwards Law…
These are just three of the ‘life laws’ that I’ve come across in the last two years on my journey to understanding how to attract abundance and as I came across each Law, I understood the merit behind it’s ethos, however, the last one I came across stuck in my craw and nothing I did would root it out.
The Backwards Law, so coined by Alan Watts in his 1951 book The Wisdom of Insecurity, talks about how the more you try for one outcome, you’ll get the opposite.
The example he gives in the book is about the dichotomy of trying to float and sinking, and then trying to actively sink, but the water pushes you back up and makes you float.
“When you try to stay on the surface of the water, you sink; but when you try to sink, you float. When you hold your breath, you lose it”.
And while these things are true, and bring to mind such physics theories as Archimedes’ Principle and Newton’s Three Laws of Motion, the more I thought about these laws and tried to reconcile their similar, yet largely differing teachings, it occurred to me that the only way they all work, is through Harmony.
So it’s true that the more you put good vibes into the world, the more good you’ll get back ( Law of Attraction) and it’s true that the more you overthink on something, the more of the opposite you’ll get ( backwards law) and it’s also true that when you make space, that space will also be filled by something else ( Vacuum’s Law).
So how do all of these truths make it into your world?
How do they bring you the abundance and high vibe energy that all the energy workers promise you can have when you ascribe to the Laws?
GET THIS PREMIUM POST AND SIX (6) AMAZING OTHERS IN THE ASHLEE SPEAKS CATEGORY HERE!
what awaits you:
You’ll discover how all of these laws actually work together and how you can get them to make sense in your own life.
Ashlee gives insights and methods to bring more success into your life.
Ashlee reveals what her law of Harmony actually is and how you can try it today.
If anyone had told me there would be a global pandemic that would lock-down the entire world and confine humans to their homes, stopping all manufacturing and travelling, I would have laughed and laughed and laughed.
Prior to 2020, none of that seemed even remotely possible!
And yet, here we are.
Across the globe we have all faced the exact same challenges, with the pandemic known as the Corona Virus (Covid-19).
Thanks to this virus and the way it so quickly infected people and some animals, with its varying aggressive strains, we as the human race had to take a hard look at our health practices and drastically upgrade them.
As I write this, many countries around the world are beginning to reopen up their businesses and people are coming out of quarantine, and interacting with each other in person again, after months of online socializing , but even as we are aware there must now be a ‘new normal’ as there is yet no marketable vaccine for this highly contagious virus, I know there are many practices that will continue to be enforced as good health practices, even after the epic time of Covid-19.
For me, here are the top personal practices that I’m going to be practicing forever!
(Click through the numbers below to read all of 7!)
It has been ingrained in me from a very young age that success in any form, comes from hard work. This belief is what got me through my Common Entrance Examination when I was ten, got me to my high grades at the CXC level when I was fifteen and what saw me burn right out in college, only to fight for supremacy in University.
It is a concept that has also seen me through many days at my various jobs and even more so as a budding entrepreneur.
However, it is also a concept that I realized I grossly misinterpreted and drove too far, too deeply. The concept of hard work suggests to me sweat, blood, tears and an unrelenting drive to achieve my goal. The flip side of that being, there is little room for fun, happiness, mistakes or patience, things I realized I needed for a healthy life.
It is a concept that I have grappled with for years because if I was not successful in something, then it meant I needed to work even harder, and had to make even more sacrifices, which always felt wrong but necessary.
Those sacrifices often times came in the form of spending time with loved ones, taking breaks, taking good care of my health and body and becoming even more of a workaholic who had nothing to show for it.
It meant I had to do more, dig in my heels further, cut out all distractions and drive myself ever onward towards success.
Success meant hard work.
It’s only later in my life, late twenties really that I began to understand that hard work did not actually mean eye-strain, sleepless nights, fighting to work with people who did not want to work for me or sacrificing time with love ones .
It did not mean self-punishment or being super unhealthy. In fact it turns out that hardwork meant having a new school of thought, where I needed to do less, which allowed me to have even more.
As an entrepreneur, I listened to many webinars on strategy, on building up my business and all the things that I absolutely had to have in place or guaranteed failure of my business, and I am here to say that all of that was absolutely wrong.
In life it’s not about having the right strategy, it’s not about working yourself to death and it is definitely not about robbing yourself of happiness. What it is about is fueling your high energy meter.
Psychologist, mindset coaches, spiritual healers and intuitive entrepreneurs all know the truth behind living your best life and being successful.
In short, they all know one secret truth:
GET THIS PREMIUM POST AND SIX (6) AMAZING OTHERS IN THE MIND & SOUL CATEGORY HERE!
what awaits you:
The secret all the experts, gurus and yours truly now know to be true and has helped to become way more success in all areas of life.
Gabby Bernstein weighs in on what a ‘Super Attractor’ is and how becoming this inspires even more success in life
We talk fear addiction and how to rehab the habit in real life.
Ashlee talks about her struggles with accepting this new way of reaching success and it’s not at all what you’d think it’d be.
We break down how this weird concept, unlocks the lifestyle you desire when applied daily.
Savage X Cotton Jersey Bralette and High Leg Bikini ( Blue Cush Floral Print)
Why We’re Curious:
Now I’m not usually one for any kind of floral print anything, but the moment I saw this bralette and the bikini bottom, from the Savage X Fenty collection, which for anyone living off the grid, is the lingerie line from Superstar and Mega Entrepreneur Rihanna.
I’m slowly getting into more lingerie, for myself as an added boost to my self-esteem and body love and I love, the colour blue so much!
The Lingerie line , Rihanna states is not for the male gaze, but for the female. And the website encourages women to live unapologetically as themselves, embracing all of them. I’m sold on the messaging and also on the cuts of these sets!
The reviews, have also been exactly the kind of thing to make me wanna wear them forever, and I’m not into bralettes, because they usually do not support the more chesty of women, but I’d try these!
Look at this review:
I have to admit, I was skeptical about this coming in my VIP box because bralettes with no padding or minimal support don’t usually work out for me and my “girls” (I’m a 34DD). I was delightfully surprised, though, to find that this actually fit quite well! Now, I wouldn’t wear this out unless I was wearing a bulky sweatshirt because it doesn’t provide much support, but it’s perfect for lounging around! I can see myself putting this on when I’m relaxing all day or when I come home from work.
Ok, gang, who has any Savage X Fenty lingerie and tell me how comfy is it really!
Can I really have what I want in this life and can it be easy?
This was the question I struggled with for years upon years and most often than not, the answer I came up with was a resounding ‘no’.
I was taught hardwork, struggling and paying dues were all the benchmarks I had to go though repeatedly, before I could see any hint of success.
I was taught to wait for the inevitable shoe to drop, if anything good ever happened to me and without truly noticing it, this was the way I started to live my entire life.
I started to mistrust people who were kind, friendly and seemed generally good natured, because it reminded me of how I used to be and made me upset that I was no longer that person, but I couldn’t be that person, because all the lessons I’ve learnt ( and learnt well) yelled at me that I had to be guarded, I had to people please, I had to hide who I was and look to other successful people to show me what my life should look like, what my thoughts should be and what I was allowed to achieve.
Now here’s the thing, you simply cannot have this mindset when you’re looking to do great things. I’m a naturally empathetic person and something ALWAYS felt wrong about this lifestyle, but damn if I could put my finger on what exactly it was.
So years go by and my intuition,- that whispering guardian angel that lives within me- that I would occasionally listen to every now and again, started pestering me and pestering me. It was sick of seeing me settle, sick of seeing me lose confidence and looking for a semblance of affection in the wrong people.
It was tired of me adding unnecessary burdens to my heart, tired of feeling my pain over and over again, tired of me basing my dwindling happiness on beliefs that were designed to drain it.
So it finally rose up and got my attention.
And one day, after the weeks following a tremendous health scare that I was being treated for, my defenses were down. I was for the first time in a long time, also fed up of the pain, the betrayals and feeling as if I had let myself down.
That’s when I felt the intuitive nudge; taking it as a sign from God that I simply could no longer ignore, I allowed the message to flow into me. It told me there was no need for struggle, no need to burn myself out, no need to make everything complicated.
It explained no one was impressed by any of this.
And I wanted to believe in it so bad, but old habits die really freaking hard and I felt my mind erupt into a civil war. One side preaching that life was always supposed to be joyous and beautiful, the other saying that if it isn’t hard and complicated how will I learn to appreciate it?
Turns out I was not ready for my life to be easy, I wasn’t ready to release my teachings no matter how wrong they felt. I wasn’t ready for my life to be so aligned I could have everything and anything I wanted.
I was fighting tooth and nail for my limitations.
Mind you, I tested the theory a few times and it worked beautifully each time, but it was not enough for me to rehab the 3 decades strong fear addiction. And when that truly hit me- that not only was I choosing to feel crappy and complicate my life, but I was doing so because i was so driven by fear and the need to struggle, I made a real decision to get to the bottom of this need and reprogram my mind.
It was time for me to allow my life to flow. I had seen the evidence for myself. I bought my car cash, I rented a condo for super cheap and it was in a great natural area, I was in fact never actually short on money, I always got what I wanted even if I didn’t buy it and the coup de grace, I was loved unconditionally by awesome humans!
So when it really sunk in that my life wanted to be easy, that it wanted to be successful and there was no need to stress and struggle, only to listen, align and do.
I finally started to allow things to flow. I finally moved things out of my way and reconnected with my inner being and that rare feeling of harmony and trust.
Life became so easy , I almost started to doubt its longevity again, because the last thing to leave me was the idea that good things could run out and I’d be left holding the proverbial bag. Funny how I never thought bad things could come to an end…
So I went to mindset rehab and I came out so much better for it. It’s a daily effort to reprogram my mind ( 30 years of habits do not change in a week) and each day I get stronger, more confident, more aligned and life is something I want to actively engage in again.
One of the resources I used when I was going through this period was the Level UP Journal Prompter. This book is filled with journal prompts, exercises and insights that I personally used to challenge myself into changing old teachings for new intuitive ones.
It’s easy to say I want better for myself, but as I learnt, it’s not so easy to walk the walk and release the bad habits to receive abundance. Hope and Faith are hard because of those same teachings, but it’s not impossible.
I know you’re ready to do more, to drop the effing struggle and let life actually flow in harmony as it needs to be. I know you’re over feeling as if you have to climb that oil slicked ladder, getting nowhere fast.
Use the book, go through the 9 chapters and allow yourself to expand, to grow and step into the awesome power that is your birthright. Add to your reading list now.
READY TO ELEVATE?
LEVEL UP YOUR LIFE BY LETTING YOUR REAL FEARS, DESIRES AND STRATEGIES POUR OUT OF YOU WITH THIS UNIQUE AND EFFECTIVE GUIDE
When manifesting, people become more aware of their thoughts, of the words they speak and the way they think about themselves, and so they become very, very paranoid about what many address as ‘ negative thoughts’.
Of course your words have power, of course your thoughts have power and of course the way you think about yourself is powerful.
You are a powerful, divine being!
You are a million to one in a lifetime chance of being yourself, being in this time and space and being blessed with the talents, world view and ability to share joy to others. You are a unique being.
And with great power, comes great responsibilities.
So yes, you do need to be aware of your thoughts, words and actions because they are all working in conjunction to send signals to the Divine Spirit that’s only job is to give you what you demand.
Think of the Universe/ Holy Spirit as a benevolent God that is totally whipped for you. They want to give you every single thing you want, but here’s the catch.
They have to wait for you to tell them what you want ( free will and all that) and they have no real understanding of good / bad, their language is one of energy and the frequency of which that energy vibrates when it reaches them.
So if you’re feeding your fear based state, you’ll get more problems, more reasons to stress to F out and more of all the things you say you don’t want.
Because that’s all you’re thinking about, all you’re talking about, all you believe and expect will follow you in your life.
So you look for evidence that you are NOT going to make it, and you obsess over it. When asked what you don’t want, you know those answers better than the back of your own hand. And let’s be honest, we’ve all been in this state for years. All learnt to maneuver around life based on the things we fear ( that’s how we survived).
And that’s also the reason when we do get the things we want, they happen in such a way that it further feeds our fear addiction, our stress and they do not stay good for the length of time they should.
So to move from a fear based state to one of love, so that you actually start getting what you desire , want and are being called to have, you have to do the same thing you’ve been doing with fear, but with love.
So you focus on the things you want, love the feeling of them, you understand that they will come ( same as with fear, when they do), you find evidence that your life is awesome and moving in a direction of awesome and you allow yourself to connect to you more.
To truly move, you need to address those same ‘negative emotions’, and to do that, you have to tune into them.
They are not here to hurt you, but to feed what you allow them to. They are here to test, to challenge and based on your reaction, your ego ( a vital part of your subconscious personality and the vessel through with the Universe/ Holy Spirit protects you) will continue to feed your thoughts to help you stay safe. This will manifest as either more fear or a feeling of confident intuition.
So no it’s not at all wrong to tune into your ‘negative’ thoughts or emotions. In fact what you should do is allow them to come into your mind, analyze them and listen to what they are actually telling you.
To help you with that, I’m gonna give you an exclusive exercise taken from the Level Up Journal Prompter, where you face your feelings and understand what they are actually telling you.
Tune into you right now and just be. No distractions, no interruptions, just be one with your thoughts and breathe as you are guided to, slowly and deeply.
What is an emotion or thought you are resistant to feeling or thinking.
Identify it. Look at it. Is it ultimately true?
What is present underneath that emotion?
Look at that. Is it true?
Feel your way through your various emotions, noticing the stories you’ve been telling yourself.
Observing what you’ve been telling yourself about your life or goals that do not feel good.
Become aware that these are all concepts and ideas that can be shifted.
What idea, concept, or story would feel better than the one you have been telling to yourself?
Take a break for 10 minutes a day at least and focus on the good feelings and thoughts that are now allowed to surround your happy goals.
Journal on your findings.
For more amazing exercises, homework, affirmations and journal prompts, on understanding your mindset better, add this book to your reading list right now.
READY TO ELEVATE?
LEVEL UP YOUR LIFE BY LETTING YOUR REAL FEARS, DESIRES AND STRATEGIES POUR OUT OF YOU WITH THIS UNIQUE AND EFFECTIVE GUIDE
June 17th was a big day for the Boston NAPS, as the reputable market leader in women’s prenatal and postpartum care, announced the launch of the much anticipated Nurture by NAPS, their new membership program for new and expecting mothers.
Nurture by NAPS, is a subscription membership program which offers accessibility, comfort and community to new mothers.
The new virtual education program is evidence-based, with an instructional curriculum from women going through pregnancy all the way through the early stages of motherhood.
While I personally have no children of my very own, I am the very proud Aunt to a boy and girl fraternal twin and plaything to a precocious six year old girl, in short I know how stressful and sometimes isolated new mothers can feel as some of my friends have confided their fears, worries and lack of knowledge to me.
This is why when I was contacted with the release that the Boston NAPS was going digital, especially in this time of Covid-19- which has not made being pregnant any easier at all, I knew I had to share this to my platform.
As noted by the press release, the Nurture by NAPS educational platform, seeks to ‘ provide women with scalable, on demand pregnancy, postpartum, and parenting-related courses, procured and instructed by their team of highly-qualified medical professionals’; which is basically means, it’s there to take the guess-work out of your new life adventure- being a new mother.
“We are thrilled to bring our vision to life with the launch of Nurture by NAPS, reflecting our unwavering commitment to provide a healthy combination of medical and real-life mom advice, paired with a non-judgmental, access-from-anywhere community,” remarked Jamie O’Day & Emily Silver, Co-Founders of Boston NAPS.
If you are unaware of the Boston NAPS, let me give you some back-story about Co-Founders Jamie O’Day (BSN, RN, IBCLC) and Emily Silver (MSN, NP-C, IBCLC).
These two lovely ladies who are mothers to 5 children combined with over 10 years experience as former Labor and Delivery nurses, founded Boston NAPS in 2011 as a side hustle during their time working together as Registered Nurses in labor and delivery unit of a local hospital where follow up postpartum care was a numerous request by many of their patients.
From there, this experienced and qualified duo worked diligently to help women feel more informed, confident and supported as they navigated pregnancy and of course parenthood.
So did we expect anything less from those who truly understand what others are going through as new mothers and as nurses combined when the pandemic hit the world and globally made it one of the scariest times to be a new mother?
Of course not.
It makes sense to me that the company would not only realize that with social distancing mandates unfolding that they would need to help more mothers on an even larger scale and in response, Nurture by NAPS was created and launched in June of this year.
It is a very timely launch as according to the March of Dimes, more than 5 million women in the U.S live in ‘maternity care desert’, lacking access to professional obstetric and postpartum care, which means that Nurture by NAPS will be bridging the healthcare accessibility gap for these women who have been underserved in these communities.
“By creating a scalable, on demand curriculum that directly serves expecting and new moms with evidence-based educational content, we’re ultimately transforming the definition of community with digital access, while empowering women to feel confident in their decision-making, and addressing the trials of physical isolation via essential pregnancy, postpartum care and mental health resources,” says Jamie O’Day & Emily Silver, Co-Founders of Boston NAPS.
The Nurture by NAPS platform includes: Video content produced by medical professionals; Live webinars chalk-filled with valuable content; Weekly live Q&A sessions addressing trending topics; “Ask a Nurse” feature that offers parents an opportunity to tap into the expertise of nurses within 24 hours, and more. The programs are categorized chronologically: Pregnancy, 0-3 months, 3-6 months, 6-9 months, and 9-12 months. Programming starts at $175. (Taken directly from press release)